Sooooooo.

What do you want to hear? Mad ramblings? Sad stuff? Whining? I could give you all three if you'd like. Let's do it this way....

1) 4 years ago yesterday started a chain of events that would forever change my life. I was running to lead the Rookie Running program at my old job. I was late, literally running there & had to go. She pulled in my driveway (she was supposed to be at Tai Chi (yes, really) down the road. She told me she didn't feel good & after numerous calls to her doctor & 20 questions with Mom she finally admitted that she felt like she did when she had her first open heart surgery nearly 13 years prior. I drove her to the hospital & things were never the same. Mom was admitted & found to have had a mild heart attack. They kept her & finally did an angiogram on Friday sadly learning that she had 4 arteries that were completely blocked. Tears were shed, surgery was eminent but they couldn't do it for a couple days due to the Plavix she was on. Doctor's move? Send her home to enjoy the weekend with her family. We had NO idea what would transpire on Monday morning when they took her into surgery. The last thing my Mom said to me was "oh please don't cry, I'm so not done with you yet."

That's all I can write about that for now. The tears are flowing enough.

2) I'm still doing Insanity & loving the program. It's so intense, brutal but so kick ass quite frankly. I'm doing it 3-4 days a week but after this morning's super intense 20 min elliptical session, things are going to change up just a bit.

3) Kevin asked me last night if I'd found the scale (LOL.) Why yes, I did but totally by accident. While I know that I'm shrinking (hips & tummy down an inch), I'm really not comfortable with the number that I see on the scale. I'm not letting it ruin my day, starving myself, going carb free or any other stupidity that could ensue but I will say that I'm concerned. I would be lying if I didn't say that I feel a bit fluffy even knowing that things are shrinking. My clothes still fit, etc but I do want to drop some weight. Not sure how totally to approach it other than to continue to eat. A concern truly is that I might just not be eating enough for the activity. I'm doing my training & doing either Insanity or running for cardio around 5 days a week.

My new thought is this.....20 mins of balls to the wall cardio on training days then Insanity or running on cardio only days. Then my body is getting a little more variety. My body shuts down if I do too much or the same thing. So this will shake it up a bit & make sure I'm not overdoing. Plus, it felt really good to rock out an uber sweaty session this morning.

Thoughts & feedback are always welcome!!!!!!